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17.07.2013 | 旅程結束

[Volume 8 Issue 7, #1756]
與某朋友whatsapp之際, 無意中提及生老病死呢一個話題.. 所以就今日就好自然地寫呢一個題材, 不過我覺得生老病死始終都係人生必經嘅階段, 與其畏懼避談, 倒不如坦然面對來得實際.. 於是我就係度認真探討, 如果臨老嘅時候我係孓然一身嘅話會係點樣?? 如果將來知道自己其實淨低只有一個月甚至係一日命, 我會點樣?? 結束生命旅程前一刻究竟會係咩情況?? 我仲能夠繼續堅強同正面, 定係已經變成畏懼同負面?? 今日呢個post好短但係非常之有份量, 或者應該咁講, 有時後能夠正視生命之旅不同階段, 其實都未必係件壞事.. :)
was whatsapping with a friend and out of a sudden we touched on the topic of age, health and death.. which naturally inspired me to blog on the same topic today, but i think they are stages of life that we should positively face rather than to avoid.. so that actually invited me to ponder, what if i am left all alone when i get old?? what if i already knew i am left with only a month's or even just a day's life?? how is my life going to be towards the end of the journey?? will i still stay strong and positive, or will i turn weak and negative?? a short post today but i guess it is heavy enough to make all of us think, instead i sometimes do think it makes no harm to seriously think about all these natural stages of the journey of life.. :)

84 comments:

  1. You're thinking of getting married? Raise a family?

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  2. Morning, SK. Hope your day will be good and all the days ahead too... We do not know what tomorrow will bring and all we can do is to live life to the fullest, and be the best we can...

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  3. Replies
    1. Nobody will know what will happen later...

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    2. Live your life to the fullest...

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    3. Good morning STP (you are early for two days already), Somewhere in Singapore & All

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  4. Vanakam! Oh death. My favorite topic

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  5. Being dealing 生老病死 *shēng lǎo bìng sǐ* everyday, partly my profession and partly my interest in preparing my death instead of preparing how to live the rest of my life in reverse

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    1. 生老病死 is just a cycle . I think people dont really fear death leh...more of fearing how and when going to die.

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  6. Life is impermanent and in a flux but death is certain since we know its certain why not deal with it.

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    1. I read some wise words somewhere that ....LIFE IS SO UNCERTAIN BUT DEATH IS CERTAIN....

      Why do humans rather sweep these topics under carpets? It is better to dwell in the thoughts about the certain than the uncertain. Right or not brother Bananaz?

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    2. Sorry GTG in a rush to some where shall be right back.

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    3. Absolutely korek korek korek!!!

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    4. Sharing one of the Aspiration in a daily Evening Recitals:

      "I know that should the moment come for me to leave the world, I shall do so without fear or regret because I leave the world a better person than when I came into it".

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    5. When we are in our teens we stayed in our parents' house, later got married and moved out to start a family either rent or purchase first house or apartment. Stayed for a couple of years then upgraded and moved to a much bigger house. So we have been moving houses at least a few times which are temporary. Strangely many have not thought or refuse to think of the one and only permanent home beyond the veil in our final destination?

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    6. anay you can say that again. some people will be very pantang when spea of deatgh. and if asked to make a will they will think you cursing them to die leh. very bad.

      In my work, last time....we asked them to buy insurance. Many doesnt like it.

      But when death or accidents occurs they baru realised how good it is to have insurance. Anak bini all terjaga in case of anything happen. surprisingly some of these people who pantang buy insurance are youngster

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  7. Most people would stay away from even saying the word 'death' pantang *taboo* woh, the more pantang and scared the more easy to die reason scared to death haha.

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    1. i agree with you.

      of course la if CNY or bday not to mention die la but others days...well...some just like that....talk about death...very pantang

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  8. Aiyoyo if you post this during the ghost month lagi pantang choy choy choy ..dai kart lai si *canto* kakaka

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  9. It's indeed a heavy topic! Elderly people always prevent us from talking about death. Practically, most of us try to avoid this kind of topic. We would rather talk about being healthy and alive for a few decades at least.

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    1. I agree that many old people are afraid of deaths. I have met many who are not scared and kept talking about it. There was my great Aunt in Ipoh whose husband's name is outside Jusco - Jalan Dr Teh Lean Swee. Before she passed away, she had bought all the clothes that she wanted to be clothed in her coffin and gave a step-by-step list on the funeral procedures which included all the exact types of drinks and nyonya kuehs to be served to guests!!

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    2. Dying i dignity. When as a child we grew up seeing and touching a bulky Chinese traditional coffin at home coz my dad bought it in advance and kept in the house.

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    3. My papa found a spot he likes when he was 50 years old with the grave and tomb erected and names engraved in red color and at the same time booked his bulky chengai wood coffin. He lived up till 92 years and that earlier coffin in the old house was used by my grandpa who passed on at age 84.

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    4. Bananaz would wish to have a F1 shaped coffin but sad to say no such coffin available in the market. Bananaz has made a pre-arrangement, purchased a double burial lot and the funeral services two years ago on an interest free installment with a total piece of mind and no worries of any price hike in 10-20 years from now.

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    5. Oh My Goodness!! This Bananaz is so kinky to wish for F1 shaped coffin. Muahahahaha.... I thought you would prefer Banana shaped one.
      You should just opt for cremation and throw your ashes in the banana plantations. That would be cheaper and hassle free.... However it is wise that your bought your own plots ahead so that you won't be buried in places that you may not like. The land costs sure rises very fast and someday your plot might have to be cleared to build a shopping mall or condominium like in Spore. We may not know the future so I always believe in the saying ~ "When you come to the bridge, just cross it"

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    6. my mom also bought her cemetery plot already. The oher day she was in ICu she kept talking about that. Say if she dies keep it simple. No need waste money. got cemetary plot already bla bla bla

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  10. Good Morning bloggers. This topic has been in my head for many years. I started thinking more about the future after seeing so many Hospice's terminally ill patients who faced the realities with much regrets. Most of them never believed what they had to go through for being alone. When they were sick, the children were not around, not free or dumped them! They have invested all the entire life's savings on the children's educations and only hoped for nothing in return but just the CARE and LOVE from the kids. They were very disappointed instead.

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    1. It would be the saddest if our life span lives far longer than our money

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    2. It is important to own at least an apartment so that if we ever ran out of cash during old age, we could rent out all the rooms and sleep in the kitchen!! That would give us income and food on the table. If we can cook and do laundry for the tenants, that would be a big bonus with extra income for added services.

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    3. I dont really agree on when they are sick children dump them completely.


      AT times the children is unable to give them the care they need as compared to the people in hospice.

      Some of the old folks can turn abusive towards family members at this physical and mental abusive . I dont mean all but some. Hence the children had to pay people to take care of them. The children is also sad to see this but what can they do? t's hard to reason with them as their mind is set. They are "adult" but at times behave like a spoil kid whom will beat their kids in order to get something or simply to throw tanturm. You cant pacify them

      But I do agree with you is that must have property to hold on to just in case that the children unwilling or cant afford to take care of them financially

      In this point the western people are wise. They planned their retirement.

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  11. After much thoughts, I always felt that we should have a roof, some monthly income and good health preferably functioning brains & strong legs. That is the the basics I would wish.

    If we run out of money, we could rent out all the rooms in our house and use the rents as pocket money for food.

    We need sound brains so that we will remember the way home. My father lost his sense of directions and stopped driving while his legs and limbs are still strong. He forgot so many things and simple chores ~ the list is very long. I saw a TV documentary from Korea about dementia patients who eventually forgot how to wear their clothes and no longer remembers how to feed themselves or go to toilets. The poor daughter in law had to guide her father in law to urinate!!

    We need to exercise often on both our whole legs so that the bones will remain strong till our last days. If you have no kids and need to be on wheel chair, that is very tough!

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    1. yes " functioning brains " is most important. It's very bad if old folk turns delusional. They may turn abusive towards family members. Not many would understand thisng. some would say why you dont take care of your parents but in actual fact the children are trying their best to do that by giving them the necesarry nursing care under professional hand. Alone, the children may not be able to handle them and could be dangerous to themslevs and others.

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  12. At one point or another, I guess we all question our mortality.

    And what will happen to us should we live on to a grand old age.

    Nothing wrong thinking about it, right? It's not being morbid or pessimistic.

    It's being realistic.

    but hey! We live another day!

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  13. Ah Boy the photo you used is so spot on. Journey Ends 100 Feet.

    Did you find any that says Journey Ends 100 Days?

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  14. Just enjoy what you have right now... you couldn't control your own death.

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  15. yeah....dun be so pantang. Every human will have to face DEATH.

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    1. Both my parents already booked their 'place' in the temple. They doesn't want us to be kelam-kabut when 'the day' comes. Even my uncle and aunty did that too.

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    2. Do a regular check up so u can lead a more healthy lifestyle. Age is catching up, so more illness will befallen us.

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    3. Eat healthier too....this I always reminded myself. haha....

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    4. I always pray to god to take me away only when my kids are independent and grown up.

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  16. Replies
    1. What a topic for today! Choy Choy Choy!

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    2. "Loi Guo Hao Shui Kong Kor"

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    3. Semua tai kart lai si shy away to comment only in total 44 comments so far as at 20:49 hrs compared to the 100+ in previous post haha.

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    4. Bananaz you're right.... now only 55 comments... shy shy shy! All of them easily glides away after lots of comments at olive oil post the other day.

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    5. Hopefully tomorrow SK will turn up with some happy post. My wild guess - His getting married soon with Kamala... I got it right this time, blek! And Invite all of us for banana leaf curry rice...

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  17. By hook or by crook, people must always has a room to think of this matter. Nothing is ridiculous but think for the future for you and your family.

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    1. SK, you're still young to think of "Death", I supposed, even myself. But when we have a family , you eventually will think of it. It's normal to do so. On the other side, if we always think of "Death", pun tak boleh. It will make us feel down, many things will be on hold and scared to face the future. What I meant, more negative thinking rather than positive ones. Don't you think so?

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    2. We shall discuss this matter at surface and not too deep down. Cos' we won't know how far we can go? Action always speak louder than words. So why not act appropriately in present time Hehehe... Do some charity, visit the old folks home, enjoy your quality time with friends, bloggers and family members too. It is still not too late to do so.

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    3. See how STP enjoys his everyday? This is the best way to live with full of happiness.

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    4. Must be happy lah... No meaning in life if every day unhappy, angry, finding fault with everybody & everything left, right and centre... Keep the peace and spread the love and joy!

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    5. I always observe STP and admire his retirement days! So relaxing and money just rolls in every month! He eats so much, blogs so happily and relaxs so well. That's greatest gifts of life!!

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  18. Hubby and I will discuss about this matter too. Yes he is my dear and I really wish to be with him till us death do us part. I always told him that, it is better to take him away far far away from us first. I'm not "kutuk" him lar. But it is good for him. I willing to take his responsibility to take care of his family and our children. What if I "Dai" first? He will be more "san fu" taking care of the kids. I really scared my children get hunger, I dunno how they do at school, homework... I know my husband can't settle them easily "unless he hire a new wifey or a maid to take care of them" - I don't want that to happen too! my stupid & blurry sotong brain thought of that. Silly me right? Hahaha...

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    1. My mother also said the same things before as my father does not even know how to cook maggi mee or make himself a glass of hot milo! So he does not even know how to take care of his kids' welfare and daily chores. Well not all fathers need to know this since they are bread winners who bring the bacons home but Angeline is a full time office worker and full time good mother! Salutes!!

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  19. On every morning we wake up,let us pray and thank God for giving us another day to live. Yes, we earn another brand new day with our love ones!

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    1. Wish everyone always in good health. Exercise regularly, eat moderately, good to people and all living things on earth and act wisely. Of course we earn extra bonus point from every lil bits here. How many points? I have no idea too but the God will know! *_^

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    2. Angeline is always making people happy with her cakes and desserts! I am sure God would allow her to live and bake till 100 years old.

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  20. hey, now is 7th month in chinese calendar? :) Anyway, death is a solemn subject.. everyone fears getting old but nowadays it is not surprising that it is not the age that counts.. anyone can go anytime... so .. we got to thank God and treasure each day when we get up feeling good!!

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    1. Not yet ler... Chinese Lunar still in the6th month.

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    2. Yalor...not yet 7th month lah!

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  21. a short post indeed but the message it has
    to share was too deep, which
    keeps me thinking about that issue

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  22. well the thing I feared the most is death,
    who was not scared of dying anyway,
    i consider it as a universal fear we all has
    it not just us dying but the people around us were too

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  23. I actually had a post regarding of choices of dying,
    if I wanna die young, or to grow old then die,
    if we'll die young we'll never get to experience being old to the point that we can't even do things on our own, however,
    you'll miss a lot

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  24. hm death is something way beyond our knowing
    i mean it something that we can't control
    sometimes even the most healthiest people die first rather
    than those people with poor health
    and as the saying goes, "when it's your time, it surely is"

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  25. but i think what is essential for us is to
    live our lives to the fullest and be the best person we
    can be so matter when is that time is coming
    you'll know that you did something or at least
    enjoyed your life

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  26. have a great day and happy blogging sk
    take the best of care and god bless you too

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  27. Being alone when I die used to be my biggest fear but since I become a mother, my fear is dying before I'm done bringing Ethan up. I wish to live a long and healthy life so I can watch my kid grow up..

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  28. Scary to think of what you have brought up, my kids are still little, they need a lot of mothering care. I am just like Merryn, wish to live long and grow old gracefully to be able to see my kids grow up.

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  29. Hmm, interesting topic! But you sounds very emo leh!!
    Yea, life has its own ups and downs, challenges and all... But like most people are saying, we must stay positive, live everyday like there's no tomorrow, so that we won't have any regrets in the future!

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    1. "what if i am left all alone when i get old??"

      Well, thinking at the bright side, you still got money to spend for yourself, go buy anything you want, or go travel...

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    2. "what if i already knew i am left with only a month's or even just a day's life??"

      Will die anyway, so don't think too much, go ahead and eat/do whatever we want, go travel, spend money on unnecessary thing and spend times with people we love...

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    3. "how is my life going to be towards the end of the journey??"

      Well, every life has its own way of 'ending', I am not a Christian but I do believe God has His own arrangement for each life, so 听天由命吧!

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    4. "will i still stay strong and positive, or will i turn weak and negative??"

      No matter what and whether you like it or not, must stay strong and think positive! ;)

      Ok la you don't worry too much, you're still young and there's a long way to go... Gambateh!!

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  30. So the best thing to do is 活在当下!!! =]

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  31. Sometimes I always think if I've been told how long I can live, I'll try my best to do anything I want, 让生命没有留下遗憾!!! =]

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  32. Still no matter how things goes, we can't predict what's gonnna to happen in the next second so the best we can do is do the best on this moment!!! =]

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  33. BTW I like this topic, sometimes we don't think this issue is important to us, but if we have been told how long to leave, we'll start to treasure about it, don't you agree with it???

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  34. Serious topic... :( I don't like~

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    1. Aiyo why? What's wrong to blog about serious and realistic topics? I would not even bother to leave comments if I don't like it.

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  35. 我就覺得趁早安排好自己嘅身後事喺必要嘅。無謂死咗都要搞到在世嘅人咁麻煩。

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